Break The Pseudo Conventions: Free Yourself
Free Yourself from the pseudo conventions as I often hear people saying their children two different things, acquainting them with different habits, separate values, using different ways of bringing them up. They say one thing to their son and give a piece of advice to their daughter.
From childhood girls are told to play with dolls and boys are forbidden; girls wear and like pink whereas boys are strictly alarmed of this particular colour as if it is a dangerous colour for them. From very beginning their ways are separated, their thoughts, habits, values are divided instead of teaching them one single thing that although they look physically different but their souls are made up of same ingredients: Love, Strength, Intellect, values, affection, softness of heart and innocence because they both are human beings.
But pity is that it is expected from girls to be delicate, fragile, pea brain, submissive, seeking for others protection. On contrary, boys are not accepted if they are not muscular, tall, strong, dominative, stone-hearted as they are never allowed being emotional or crying. Why mothers advise their daughters to remain dumb statues and simply obey? Why a boy is humiliated if he cries or shed tears? Why a girl is not considered as strong to pull a carton or lift a heavy bag and needs to wait for a male family member to do it for her as if she is weak. Why a boy is restricted to enter kitchen zone or to wash dishes or to cook food.
I simply say no to these stupid and typical taboos and meaningless conventions. If a woman needs to go to a job or she willingly does a job then why her earning money is condemned just because of the typical superstition that it draws out “Barkat” from the family income? Why is that when a man does household or interested in cooking or takes it or stitching as a profession then why he is abused and called “Zanana”?
This seems ridiculous that sometimes I wonder who the mastermind behind inventing these unworthy norms was. Who told us to make these differences? I think it is a never-ending chain of fake customs that are embedded in and run through our veins from generation to generation. We never question but blindly follow them because “A leopard cannot change its spots.”
I inquire what is wrong with a girl if she chooses not to play with silly dolls or with the boy who usually cries or becomes emotional and has a delicate heart. What is the problem If a boy wants to stay home all day and why cannot a woman take off from her daily household for a single day? Why is it necessary for a man to be a superhero or for a woman to be flimsy and behave like a delicate doll?
I hate this idea of ridiculing any gender for their specific personalization against the stereotypical and worn out conventions. Gender discriminations based on favourite colours, hobbies, level of strength are typical conventional ways which break several hearts. We must shut those mouths that create or promote these discriminations.
If a girl is fat or a boy is not tall then does it change their gender? Or make them incapable of living a normal life? Why a woman is not eligible for marriage when she just touches early thirties of her age? Why it is that all the responsibilities to earn a living lie just on a man’s shoulders when he has just seen twenty springs of his life?
We need answers to these questions. We call ourselves modern people of the modern world then why these pseudo and sham clichés? We are the one who need to uproot, break and vanish these conventions forever from our society and our minds and we need to spare ourselves from hurting others and I need all of your to free yourself from this kind of thinking.
Written By: Momina Azhar Butt